My little sous chef

My life as a Mom of four means each day is it's own roller coaster. We started off the day by going to the park and the lake - which went well. We then had to give the girls medicine for Girardia. Even though we got the medicine mixed into a chocolate syrup, Shkuri was not too happy about taking it, which made for a rather stressful ten minutes as I gave it to her in the syringe and had to hold her so she didn't spit it back out at me (at $30 a dose, she was not going to spit it out).
Today was pretty hot for Olympia, and we played out in the yard in the pool for most of the day, with a brief respite of watching Cinderella for quite time. My very lovely friend Izzy stopped by for a few hours and braved my family for a few hours. Shkuri and Hamda helped me make dinner. They love, love, love to help me prepare food and chop above all else. Normally, I wouldn' t let a six year old anywhere near a knife, but last week I looked at my side to see Shukri chopping away like a trained Parisian Sous Chef. I keep a close eye on her, and she makes cooking dinner fun. I have tried to get the boys to help me - Isaac isn't interested and Elias is still a bit young to do much.
After dinner Isaac was a bit wound up and had gotten in trouble, so I sat with him and read for awhile. We are reading about Ancient Egypt and were reading some Egyptian mythology when I mentioned to him that he was going to start piano next week when school started. He asked me why Shkuri wasn't taking piano, and I told him I thought he would want to do it alone. He told me he thought Shkuri would really like them and she should take them to. I was very excited to hear that - he isn't usually very open and nice to her, and this gave me hope! Tonight I am looking forward to walking to the coffee shop for iced coffee and then plunging into studying .We are going to be at the cabin for labor Day weekend and I have to take a pharmacology exam on cardiac medications before we go (I am in a distance program, and can choose my own dates). Uggh.

My Life So far

So I am finally, truly getting around to putting some pictures and a recollection of the last three weeks. Here are some pictures from Addis; Hamda on our first night together, the girls, Sister Carmela, and I at Kidanet Mihret Orphanage the day we left Addis. The third photo is Shukuri on a rock at Sodoret Hot Springs in the Rift Valley (our one day trip)
This Picture is us at Ritmo House after we got our hair braided. Normally, I abhor any caucasian having their hair braided ala Bo Derek, but the girls thought it was great, and my limited amharic prevented me from explaining I only wanted one braid to the hairdresser.




This is Jonas at Mary Famm, the small cafe right around the corner from our guest house. It was a three table hole in the wall cafe were local guys gathered to watch satelite t.v. Jonas was wonderful to the girls and made some of the best macchiatos I have ever tasted. Ethiopians take their coffee very, very seriously.





Our families time in Addis was almost beyond description. We met the girls the first day we were there. They were at an orphanage run by two nuns, Carmela and Lagarda who are in the same order as Mother Theresa. The orphanage was nice and fairly modern - although there were 150 kids, so it was definitely a busy place. I was prepared for things to be very rough, but right from the beginning Ariel and I felt very attached to the girls. Hamda started calling me Mommy right away, and neither of them seemed too upset leaving the orphanage. We only stayed for a little bit of time. We returned on our last day to say goodbye. We had a social worker help translate for the girls and let them know that we were only going for a little bit, and we were not leaving them there.
On the last day, we were very suprised to be given pictures of the girls with their father and a picture of their mother. The girl's father was Ethiopian, but they lived in Somalia in the Ogaden desert. The Ethiopian Army and Somalian militia there are in a constant state of war. The girl's Mother died in childbirth and their father brought them to Ethiopian Social Services office because he was too sick to care for them. We have our suspicions that he had AIDS, but we will probably never know for sure. It is very common for orphans to have living relatives, This was not our case, since there father lived so far away.
The rest of our time in Addis was spent doing a few small things, going to the Embassy and taking one day trip. There isn't a great deal of tourist spots in Addis, but it is thrilling to just be outside. Our guest house was in a middle class neighborhood a bit away from the city center. The streets were washed away because of the rainy season and we didn't walk too much since everything was mud. One of our favorite things in Addis was eating at Mary Famm and seeing Jonas. People would walk in and ask us questions about the girls and America. Another great thing about Addis was the religous diversity. From our house, you could hear the muslim call to pray five times a day. We talked to Muslims, Catholics, Protestants, and Ethiopian Orthodox. There is no segregation in the city and everyone says they get along fine.
We did a bit of shopping around the city, although the girls got very overwhelmed quickly because we attracted a lot of attention from beggars and sales people. We visited Layla house, the orphanage our adoption agency runs. We spent an afternoon at the U.S. Embassy getting the girls visas. Everything went very smoothly for us, although another family adopting a young girl at the same time as us had a lot of problems. We ate an inordinate amount of Injera, and took the girls to a few American style restaraunts, which were too fancy for us. One day we went on a two hour drive to the Rift Valley, where humans are first thought to have evolved. We went to a lake and Sodaret hot springs to take the girls swimming. When the realized what we had planned they refused to get out of the car. Ethiopians don't do much swimming. We did get to see some friendly monkeys, which thrilled Ariel. Mostly we just hung out and wandered around. By the time we left we were very comfortable with the girls and they seemed very happy to be with us. They loved hot water baths and learned to use a flush toilet. They were silly and very giggly. After we put them to bed at night, we could hear them singing and chattering away.

Now we have been home for two weeks and it has been pretty hard. I think the girls are doing as absolutely well as can be expected, but it is still rough. We had to go to the Dr. , which was not fun at all. I registerd Shukuri for 1st grade - our local school has excellent ESL programs. We were going to send Hamda to Kindergarten, but she is definitely not ready. Hamda is pretty clingy and throws rather frightening temper tantrums. They are learning English quickly, and I am learning a bit of Amharic. They do not like our dogs. Elias is doing really well, and doesn't seem to have any problem with new family members. Isaac is having a harder time, but we are trying to give him lots of time and room to be upset and work through stuff.
Things have gotten easier the last two days as we settle in as a family. I am trying to be very patient with everyone - which isn't by biggest virtue!! I am realizing that one of my children is always going to be mad at me, no matter what I do. It is a lot of work to have four kids six and under!! I am off of work until the beginning of October - but frankly I miss it a little. I am struggling through Women's Health and Pharmacology for school. On numerous occasions the last few weeks, I have worried that I made a terrible mistake and that I am completely bonkers.
One question I have been asked a couple of times is whether you can love an adopted child as much as your own, and I didn't know what to answer. Now I can feel I can answer with a loud YES. I am suprised at how little difference there is between my feelings for my boys and our new girls. They are such wonderful, happy, beautiful children. I am tearing up as I think about how lucky we are to have all of them. I promise to post more pictures soon and I look forward to introducing them to all of our friends and family over time.

Landing

I had intended to do a day by day blog of our trip in Addis, but now that we have been home for four days, I realize that is just not going to happen. In summary, Ariel and I had a truly amazing time in Addis. I was trying to prepare myself that I wouldn't neccesarily love the girls right away, but I did. Ariel and I fetl close to the girls right away, and they called us Mommy and Daddy and our guest house (a little rental house for adoptive parents) was filled with laughter all the time. We also really enjoyed being in Africa - Addis is a very big sprawling, chaotic city, but everyone we met was lovely. Almost everyone fussed over the girls - and what new parent doesn't love that?
Our flight home was brutal - I don't want to see a plane for a long, long time. The girls did as good as can be expected, considering the 31 hour fly time. Extra special thanks goes out to my MHC friend Margaret who saved us from an 8 hour layover at Dulles by giving us showers at her apartment and taking us around to Reston, VA and Washington D.C..
Now we are home and the going has been a bit rough. Ariel is back at work, and I am on leave for another six weeks. Shukuri is doing wonderfully, but Hamda is having a bit of hard time. We are finding that she is really more like a two year old than a five year old, and is very needy. I am doing my very best to be very patient and firm, but it is especially tough with the language barrier. Today we spent three hours at the Dr.'s and the lab and I am feeling especially overwhelmed.
I am really looking forward to getting to see our friends again and getting life settled down into a routine. Considering all that is going on, all of the Biggerstaffs are doing well, but it taking a lot of adjustment for us.

Addis

So far everything in Addis has been going amazingly well...after a unpleasant airport stay/flight from Rome, Ar and I got in. After a few hours sleep at Ritmo House we went to pick up the girls at Kidnet (KM) their orphanage. Hamda, the younger one started off everything by jumping it my arms, grabbing my neck and repeating Mommy over and over again. Shukur has been a little more quite, but they are both wonderful. They seem to be perfectly healthy and couldn't be better behaved. Their are no words for how amazing our first day together has been. They only speak a bit of English, but we spend a lot of time laughing. They are starting to warm up and chat and play around us. I can't wait to post pictures! We are really enjoying Addis as well - it is a bit awkard constantly being followed by people who want/need things. I think it bothers the girls a great deal when people come to our car to beg. I have many more stories to tell that will just have to post later.

Ciao

Friends and Family,
I dont have pics to post yet, but Ar and I send our greetings from Rome. We arrived here safe and sound and so far everything has gone lovely and smooth. We currently are attempting a death march to all the must do touristy sites of Rome through 95 degree weather with 95% humidity. We have seen the coluseum, pantheon, and the vatican as well as eaten some good gelato. Back at home, the boys are doing well too. Ar is taking lovely pictures that I will definitely post later. Ciao.