My Life So far

So I am finally, truly getting around to putting some pictures and a recollection of the last three weeks. Here are some pictures from Addis; Hamda on our first night together, the girls, Sister Carmela, and I at Kidanet Mihret Orphanage the day we left Addis. The third photo is Shukuri on a rock at Sodoret Hot Springs in the Rift Valley (our one day trip)
This Picture is us at Ritmo House after we got our hair braided. Normally, I abhor any caucasian having their hair braided ala Bo Derek, but the girls thought it was great, and my limited amharic prevented me from explaining I only wanted one braid to the hairdresser.




This is Jonas at Mary Famm, the small cafe right around the corner from our guest house. It was a three table hole in the wall cafe were local guys gathered to watch satelite t.v. Jonas was wonderful to the girls and made some of the best macchiatos I have ever tasted. Ethiopians take their coffee very, very seriously.





Our families time in Addis was almost beyond description. We met the girls the first day we were there. They were at an orphanage run by two nuns, Carmela and Lagarda who are in the same order as Mother Theresa. The orphanage was nice and fairly modern - although there were 150 kids, so it was definitely a busy place. I was prepared for things to be very rough, but right from the beginning Ariel and I felt very attached to the girls. Hamda started calling me Mommy right away, and neither of them seemed too upset leaving the orphanage. We only stayed for a little bit of time. We returned on our last day to say goodbye. We had a social worker help translate for the girls and let them know that we were only going for a little bit, and we were not leaving them there.
On the last day, we were very suprised to be given pictures of the girls with their father and a picture of their mother. The girl's father was Ethiopian, but they lived in Somalia in the Ogaden desert. The Ethiopian Army and Somalian militia there are in a constant state of war. The girl's Mother died in childbirth and their father brought them to Ethiopian Social Services office because he was too sick to care for them. We have our suspicions that he had AIDS, but we will probably never know for sure. It is very common for orphans to have living relatives, This was not our case, since there father lived so far away.
The rest of our time in Addis was spent doing a few small things, going to the Embassy and taking one day trip. There isn't a great deal of tourist spots in Addis, but it is thrilling to just be outside. Our guest house was in a middle class neighborhood a bit away from the city center. The streets were washed away because of the rainy season and we didn't walk too much since everything was mud. One of our favorite things in Addis was eating at Mary Famm and seeing Jonas. People would walk in and ask us questions about the girls and America. Another great thing about Addis was the religous diversity. From our house, you could hear the muslim call to pray five times a day. We talked to Muslims, Catholics, Protestants, and Ethiopian Orthodox. There is no segregation in the city and everyone says they get along fine.
We did a bit of shopping around the city, although the girls got very overwhelmed quickly because we attracted a lot of attention from beggars and sales people. We visited Layla house, the orphanage our adoption agency runs. We spent an afternoon at the U.S. Embassy getting the girls visas. Everything went very smoothly for us, although another family adopting a young girl at the same time as us had a lot of problems. We ate an inordinate amount of Injera, and took the girls to a few American style restaraunts, which were too fancy for us. One day we went on a two hour drive to the Rift Valley, where humans are first thought to have evolved. We went to a lake and Sodaret hot springs to take the girls swimming. When the realized what we had planned they refused to get out of the car. Ethiopians don't do much swimming. We did get to see some friendly monkeys, which thrilled Ariel. Mostly we just hung out and wandered around. By the time we left we were very comfortable with the girls and they seemed very happy to be with us. They loved hot water baths and learned to use a flush toilet. They were silly and very giggly. After we put them to bed at night, we could hear them singing and chattering away.

Now we have been home for two weeks and it has been pretty hard. I think the girls are doing as absolutely well as can be expected, but it is still rough. We had to go to the Dr. , which was not fun at all. I registerd Shukuri for 1st grade - our local school has excellent ESL programs. We were going to send Hamda to Kindergarten, but she is definitely not ready. Hamda is pretty clingy and throws rather frightening temper tantrums. They are learning English quickly, and I am learning a bit of Amharic. They do not like our dogs. Elias is doing really well, and doesn't seem to have any problem with new family members. Isaac is having a harder time, but we are trying to give him lots of time and room to be upset and work through stuff.
Things have gotten easier the last two days as we settle in as a family. I am trying to be very patient with everyone - which isn't by biggest virtue!! I am realizing that one of my children is always going to be mad at me, no matter what I do. It is a lot of work to have four kids six and under!! I am off of work until the beginning of October - but frankly I miss it a little. I am struggling through Women's Health and Pharmacology for school. On numerous occasions the last few weeks, I have worried that I made a terrible mistake and that I am completely bonkers.
One question I have been asked a couple of times is whether you can love an adopted child as much as your own, and I didn't know what to answer. Now I can feel I can answer with a loud YES. I am suprised at how little difference there is between my feelings for my boys and our new girls. They are such wonderful, happy, beautiful children. I am tearing up as I think about how lucky we are to have all of them. I promise to post more pictures soon and I look forward to introducing them to all of our friends and family over time.